Alright I was too depelted to actually write up a decent blog yesterday so here's my do-over and to top it off Im 6days out from WBFF worlds championship. It'll be my first figure show, Im going at this sans a coach right now simply because Im broke ass and just can't budget it in right now!!
Since my roomate Ben left, I wouldn't necessarrily say things have been rough!! In fact quite the oposite, my body has dramatically benifeted from the huge reduction in stress just from his presence being simply; not there. Cash's been short but it's what I figured so basically been making the ends meet for both my prep n generally staying alive!! Hahaha.
I guess maybe because in my 22 years I've moved 22 times in total; from the group home, to young womens shelter, to the ymca to living in a motel, to downtown ottawa on the streets, to so many rooming houses I can't even think about it, to Brockville and back; and the move to Kanata to start it all of when I was 13. So I guess being able to pick up and leave within a moments notice has always been my niche; I have everything I would really need in my gym bag or backpack, subconciously really. Ever since Ben left however I've decided I want a normal, or best I can get, to a normal life! Hahaha I'm perfectly content with my futon computer chair and table but perhaps one could start to make a home out of a house! Whihc is exactly what I've begun doing, haha, starting off small but I'm finally feeling like I don't have to pick up and leave in 3 months! That can get kinda stressful after the 12th time... hahaha... ahhh well.
My parents won't be coming to my show- it's all good though, they're there in spirit & support me the best they can, my daddy came thru with my regristration fee & my moms helped me out with my outfits for my photoshoot the following day with Jamie Watling. I've always had a fascinating relationship with the family, I wouldn't trade any of it I guess, I mean hey my life would be so different if I could go back and change somethings but I probably wouldn't be here writing this now and I probably wouldn't be doing what I am doing! I truly love my life, hard work has gotten me extremely far, despite life seriously wanting to hold me back, Ive wored hard for everything I have, very hard; hard working isn't a term I even should use it's simply being a live and moving forward. Of course theres times in my life, more than I can count, where I wish I could just not and give up but fuck man, you just cant!!! say it to yourself- "Fuck it i give up, life you win" now wait.. wait some more... wait more... has your situation changed?! Yaa mine didn't either so I got up, and kept moving forward just knowing that one day.. one day, it wasn't gonna be like this I just had to keep moving forward and eventually I'd find myself where I wanna be. Anyway
these last 6days are my favorite of all time for prep, I enjoy the tediousness and the need to be precise, I like the detail that all goes in this final week to bring out your best on stage.
Anyway everything changes based on how I feel daily, I have a general few rules I follow a week out, from the monday I water load, start my sodium cut, by tuesday my sodium has ben dropped, also zero carb til thursday, I'll have 2 full body cable depletion workout either on Monday-Tuesday or Tuesday-Wednesday, depending if I get my ass today to do my last chest day workout later today! I'll continue with my 1.5 hours of cardio a day alongside HIIT cardio session inbewteen my traing. low carb monday, zero from tuesday to thursday, thursday night I will begin a clean fat and carb load with potatoe and steak, probbaly my last 2 meals of the day, friday i will go zero carb until mid afternoon when I also drop my water then I'll clean load til friday night when I'll start my carb load for stage!! Anyway stay tuned :D
Sunday, August 21, 2011
Saturday, August 20, 2011
1week out!!
Hey everyone!!! I havent updated cuz wel i havent had internet access hahaha,. neways everythings going fairly well, working n prepping away thaaats abuot it for me!! preps been going amazing so far, i asume haha, as i dont have a coach cuz im broke ass n this is gonna me my first figure comp, we'll see how everything ties in together! haha my minds pretty much gone at this point so im gonna keep this short n sweet!! my parents wont be coming to my show but whtaever there in spirit right!! if u wanna commmeeee living arts centre missisagua (toronto) tickets online @ wbffshows.com or at the door... nick carters gonna be there wooo hooo ahahaha im registered n ready to go i have my suit n went out the other day for my photoshoot outfits wchih ill be sending to jamie watling today for the all clear lol.... annnyywaayyy ive come along way from a year ago, worked really frikken hard n sacrificed alot, lost a lot of friends n made some amazing ones in turn; wouldnt trade any of it for a second..... i want my pro card but we;ll see how it goes 1st time for everything see ya in 7 days! xo
Thursday, July 14, 2011
SO FOCUSED
So haven't updated my blogs in a few weeks and HERE's why!!! :D if you know me, you know I allllways for whatever fascinating reason, have some next level shit going on, hey, it makes life hella fun and interesting.
So Ive probably talked about Ben my roomate aka supposed to be brother- well let's just say things went WAYYYYY south hahaha; lyric describes it perfectly how i feel "i took your words and i believed in eveything you said to me, ya thats right- if someone said 3yrs from now youd be long gone, Id stand up and punch em all out cuz theyre all wrong, i know better cuz u said forever, and ever- who knew?!"
I need to chalk it down to karma, Ive hurt people so I know Bens just God's, the worlds way of showing me how it feels. "I wish i cud still call u friend, id give anything" . Having to go look back on over a year and really take the good memories, bank them but move on not really knowing if those good memories were all a lie, part of a masterplan to fool you. Who knew?! I didnt- i should have opened my eyes and i should have recognized the signs which were right infront of me, but the funyn thing about love is you overlook so much. You forgive so much. I look back at our pics of one another, and its we werent even dating, but a relationship is a relationship, he was family to me and it blows my mind- looking back at that guy who i spent so many good times with- how he either fooled me the entire step of the way or how someone cud lose themselves so much. I dont know who he is now, but I want to believe i did, and who I knew was a good person, a little off, but good... Im proud to say tho since this my lfies gotten seriously better, prep has never been so "easy" and my minds never been so focused.
He moved out a few weeks ago, basically in the middle of the night- screwed me on my lease or atleast tried to- said I broke into his car, robbed him of thousands, am the reason his relationships dont work otu, sabotaged him, have never wanted anything but harm to him, he's split up all our mutual friends- not my loss tho I dont need shady people in my life..... Yaaaa ha, this is coming from the guy who I've moved 4 times with, who I trained to lose 65lbs... Oh well.
So thaaaat's why i've been behing on my blogs hahaha, Working and traing and eating and dealing with nonsense! NOW that ure all caught up haha.
Im officially 6.5wks out from my wbff worlds debut. im ammmppped. Im not ready yet, still have more cardio and more traing to get done, more lean meals to get in me, but im more than confident Im going to leave a lasting impression on the wbff stage. Im currently not with a coach right now, Ive decided since Im pretty broke from my roomate dipping on my lease and wat not that Ill just do this show on my own. I may or may not compete this Nov with OPA if I do I wanna go with TeamStirling for my prep- sooo if ur reading this you guys im coming at you sooon!!!! :D
Im beyond stoked, i will be shooting with Jamie Watling the sunday after the competition- again big shout outs! I plan on being in the best physique and condition i have ever been in. To me at this point it isnt even about winning- for sure I want my pro card; but Ive exceeded my expectations of myself, im beyond estatic with wat I have accomplished thus far and by standing on stage in 6.5wks to unveil what Ive been bustin my ass in the gym for- i just wanna show everyone the true meaning of hard work. If u want it badly enough, if you really want it, and you work your ass off, and I mean work your ass off- when someone says theyre working hard, your answer better be im working harder than hard working- u can achieve anything- the skys the limit and beyond. it's true when they say a bunch of small actions will lead up to something great.
Despite all that is going on in my life , the people coming and giong, all the rumours im sure being spread about me- i WILL NOT be stopped and I WILL NOT let them take my focus from me- you fuel me u fuel my fire- anger is my flame it always has been, pain is the spark - Im headed straight to the top.
For the first time In my life; ever since i began lifting- ive felt important, Ive felt good about myself; I finally feel like I know what Im supposed to be doing in my life- it may not seem like much to you but it's everything to me. I was so lost and broken, scared and dying to live; I wake up more alive than I have ever been in my life I can honestly say that its the first time I feel like my prayers have been answered- things are making sense and my life has never been better. I jsut wanna show everyone what it's really done for me, n if your work hard at it, you'd be amazed at what it can do for you.
Stay tuned !!
So Ive probably talked about Ben my roomate aka supposed to be brother- well let's just say things went WAYYYYY south hahaha; lyric describes it perfectly how i feel "i took your words and i believed in eveything you said to me, ya thats right- if someone said 3yrs from now youd be long gone, Id stand up and punch em all out cuz theyre all wrong, i know better cuz u said forever, and ever- who knew?!"
I need to chalk it down to karma, Ive hurt people so I know Bens just God's, the worlds way of showing me how it feels. "I wish i cud still call u friend, id give anything" . Having to go look back on over a year and really take the good memories, bank them but move on not really knowing if those good memories were all a lie, part of a masterplan to fool you. Who knew?! I didnt- i should have opened my eyes and i should have recognized the signs which were right infront of me, but the funyn thing about love is you overlook so much. You forgive so much. I look back at our pics of one another, and its we werent even dating, but a relationship is a relationship, he was family to me and it blows my mind- looking back at that guy who i spent so many good times with- how he either fooled me the entire step of the way or how someone cud lose themselves so much. I dont know who he is now, but I want to believe i did, and who I knew was a good person, a little off, but good... Im proud to say tho since this my lfies gotten seriously better, prep has never been so "easy" and my minds never been so focused.
He moved out a few weeks ago, basically in the middle of the night- screwed me on my lease or atleast tried to- said I broke into his car, robbed him of thousands, am the reason his relationships dont work otu, sabotaged him, have never wanted anything but harm to him, he's split up all our mutual friends- not my loss tho I dont need shady people in my life..... Yaaaa ha, this is coming from the guy who I've moved 4 times with, who I trained to lose 65lbs... Oh well.
So thaaaat's why i've been behing on my blogs hahaha, Working and traing and eating and dealing with nonsense! NOW that ure all caught up haha.
Im officially 6.5wks out from my wbff worlds debut. im ammmppped. Im not ready yet, still have more cardio and more traing to get done, more lean meals to get in me, but im more than confident Im going to leave a lasting impression on the wbff stage. Im currently not with a coach right now, Ive decided since Im pretty broke from my roomate dipping on my lease and wat not that Ill just do this show on my own. I may or may not compete this Nov with OPA if I do I wanna go with TeamStirling for my prep- sooo if ur reading this you guys im coming at you sooon!!!! :D
Im beyond stoked, i will be shooting with Jamie Watling the sunday after the competition- again big shout outs! I plan on being in the best physique and condition i have ever been in. To me at this point it isnt even about winning- for sure I want my pro card; but Ive exceeded my expectations of myself, im beyond estatic with wat I have accomplished thus far and by standing on stage in 6.5wks to unveil what Ive been bustin my ass in the gym for- i just wanna show everyone the true meaning of hard work. If u want it badly enough, if you really want it, and you work your ass off, and I mean work your ass off- when someone says theyre working hard, your answer better be im working harder than hard working- u can achieve anything- the skys the limit and beyond. it's true when they say a bunch of small actions will lead up to something great.
Despite all that is going on in my life , the people coming and giong, all the rumours im sure being spread about me- i WILL NOT be stopped and I WILL NOT let them take my focus from me- you fuel me u fuel my fire- anger is my flame it always has been, pain is the spark - Im headed straight to the top.
For the first time In my life; ever since i began lifting- ive felt important, Ive felt good about myself; I finally feel like I know what Im supposed to be doing in my life- it may not seem like much to you but it's everything to me. I was so lost and broken, scared and dying to live; I wake up more alive than I have ever been in my life I can honestly say that its the first time I feel like my prayers have been answered- things are making sense and my life has never been better. I jsut wanna show everyone what it's really done for me, n if your work hard at it, you'd be amazed at what it can do for you.
Stay tuned !!
Saturday, June 18, 2011
10wks out!!
Alright so it's been a little while, almost a month sicne ive updated my blog. Ive just been enjoying the weather, living life, you know just loving the life i live, living the life i love!!!
So I've come to terms with the fact that dieting is my weakest point, then cardio then the lift. Hahaha. I set myself up for failure repeating the same mistakes that burnt me out from my last show. I planned too much, too soon, didn't analyze my situation enough and determine the best decision. Hense the reason why I am not currently on stage in Toronto, why I didnt compete with WBFF in April and why I have fully commited and will succeed on the WBFF WORLDS STAGE IN AUGUST in TORONTO.
I basically bit off more than I could chew, with all the best intentions yet worst planning strategies.
With much guidance from my offseason coach Pamela Bortmes @ Absolute Health & Fitness; I did put on the neccessary size. I have since decided I want to coach myself for the worlds show. Not for any particular reason other than Ive always been independant. I walk alone and stand stronger for it; it sucks sometimes but hey do what you gotta do!! I lived in a group home when I was 13, then moved back home, then when I was 17 my parents put me in a young womens shelter, from there I lived in the YMCA for about a month, then lived in a motel down on Carling ave for another few weeks with a friend, now family, I met in the young womens shelter. From there I ended up on welfare, ended up facing a charge and a 2-day court trial which was case dismissed; lived down on Murray st DT, where I had probably, at 17-18, alongside my friends, the craziest most ***ed up summer one can imagine. I then moved close to Algonquin college, attended school as a Personal support worker, graduated on the dean's list. Worked fulltime nightshift, then found my life in absolute dispair, moved to Brockville, kicked it there for a new months, then found myself in premier fitness throwing weight around like a fool who; got inspired by Mel Gardner "shit that girl is fuuuucking jacked holy shittttt" and Brittany byrd "Holy shittt that girls fiiitttttt I dont think I like her much" Hhahahahaha. Hey i'll admit i was jealous and it fueled my workouts; lol thanks Girl :P
Competed in a bikini competition, found my way back to ottwaw, bartended at a few diff places dt, but really delved into fitness, worked for goodlife, quit cuz i guess the management at the time really had no real drive for actually helping people, more like helping people spend their money; lol sooorrry GL ;) i know everyones gotta make their coin
Competed a few more times, and now here I am. Thats just a break down of my life. Ive moved around as many times as years i am old. My parents idk, theyre fairweather parents, thats the nicest way of putting it, theyre around when things are good and arent when things are bad. I wasnt an angel child, hells no, but i was a kid, :P ; sometimes its crazy how my parents can go months upon months without even knowing if im ok, sometimes it really gets to me, but i let it fuel me. i have come this far and i plan on only going further. I dont have much but i have way more than i could have ever imagined a few years ago. karma has been my speed bumps and ive accepted that, ive done dirt so life isnt going to be easy; but constantly trying to better myself i know one day thing are gonna be way more than i could have ever imagined.
Now here we are 10wks out. im leaning down nicely. My roomates actually been a huge stress, unfortunately you can care about someone so much and yet they will still backstab you, i have to chalk it down to karma. Oh well. Only gonna let it fuel me.
This will be my best show, my best physique, a completely different look. stay tuned :D
So I've come to terms with the fact that dieting is my weakest point, then cardio then the lift. Hahaha. I set myself up for failure repeating the same mistakes that burnt me out from my last show. I planned too much, too soon, didn't analyze my situation enough and determine the best decision. Hense the reason why I am not currently on stage in Toronto, why I didnt compete with WBFF in April and why I have fully commited and will succeed on the WBFF WORLDS STAGE IN AUGUST in TORONTO.
I basically bit off more than I could chew, with all the best intentions yet worst planning strategies.
With much guidance from my offseason coach Pamela Bortmes @ Absolute Health & Fitness; I did put on the neccessary size. I have since decided I want to coach myself for the worlds show. Not for any particular reason other than Ive always been independant. I walk alone and stand stronger for it; it sucks sometimes but hey do what you gotta do!! I lived in a group home when I was 13, then moved back home, then when I was 17 my parents put me in a young womens shelter, from there I lived in the YMCA for about a month, then lived in a motel down on Carling ave for another few weeks with a friend, now family, I met in the young womens shelter. From there I ended up on welfare, ended up facing a charge and a 2-day court trial which was case dismissed; lived down on Murray st DT, where I had probably, at 17-18, alongside my friends, the craziest most ***ed up summer one can imagine. I then moved close to Algonquin college, attended school as a Personal support worker, graduated on the dean's list. Worked fulltime nightshift, then found my life in absolute dispair, moved to Brockville, kicked it there for a new months, then found myself in premier fitness throwing weight around like a fool who; got inspired by Mel Gardner "shit that girl is fuuuucking jacked holy shittttt" and Brittany byrd "Holy shittt that girls fiiitttttt I dont think I like her much" Hhahahahaha. Hey i'll admit i was jealous and it fueled my workouts; lol thanks Girl :P
Competed in a bikini competition, found my way back to ottwaw, bartended at a few diff places dt, but really delved into fitness, worked for goodlife, quit cuz i guess the management at the time really had no real drive for actually helping people, more like helping people spend their money; lol sooorrry GL ;) i know everyones gotta make their coin
Competed a few more times, and now here I am. Thats just a break down of my life. Ive moved around as many times as years i am old. My parents idk, theyre fairweather parents, thats the nicest way of putting it, theyre around when things are good and arent when things are bad. I wasnt an angel child, hells no, but i was a kid, :P ; sometimes its crazy how my parents can go months upon months without even knowing if im ok, sometimes it really gets to me, but i let it fuel me. i have come this far and i plan on only going further. I dont have much but i have way more than i could have ever imagined a few years ago. karma has been my speed bumps and ive accepted that, ive done dirt so life isnt going to be easy; but constantly trying to better myself i know one day thing are gonna be way more than i could have ever imagined.
Now here we are 10wks out. im leaning down nicely. My roomates actually been a huge stress, unfortunately you can care about someone so much and yet they will still backstab you, i have to chalk it down to karma. Oh well. Only gonna let it fuel me.
This will be my best show, my best physique, a completely different look. stay tuned :D
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Wow is life fascinating!!
Wow life is just fascinating.
Lets just say eevrything changes EMBRACE IT, let it help you grow into an amazing person.
My roomate. How to describe this guy. Hes sorta like my brother. Hes family. But damn. Ever watch someone start to fall off the tracks and literally all you can do is watch?! Because no matter what you say it's falling on deaf and blind eyes and ears. heartbreaking really.
I seem to only write these blog in and around high carb day haha.
Ive dropped around 3lbs so far and a percentage since a couple of weeks ago.
I'm going about this whole process completely different than i have before.
Heck I started off going about it the same way then realised.... damn that so is not the way for success. So after revamping and figuring things out, Im more than 100% confident in my dial in for the WBFF worlds stage.
Im at the point in my fitness where I get mad dehydrated if i even think about eating shit food. And if i do, damn it feels like Ive been in the sahara for 72 hours straight. Hahaha. Its actually awesome, means the msucles are pulling in the water when I intake carbs, hmm.
I've been 100% about the diet since 17 weeks out and have already notcied huge changes in my leaness. It's only going to get more tedious and strict as the next week comes to a close.
I pulled back a bit on my cardio and really have focused 100% on the diet. its all about the diet no matter how much I wanna convince myself it isnt haha. Im going to start my double a day cardio sesh's at the 12 wks out mark. I havent full decided if Im giong to do the Oxygen cover model search however Im definetely concidering it.. and am actually headed to see Joan @ Daydreams Fitness Wear to get an old suit i havent used yet fitted JUST IN CASE!
My main focus if WBFF. I've decided by this time next year Id like to be competeing for my pro card or amongt the pro division.
Im so amped I just want the final week before my show to come it's actually my favorite, the water loading, the tediousness, its wat drives me now. Fitness saved my life and I cant wait to conitue giving it the best of me.
Anyway bootcamps and chest today. Have an awesome day til next time.
man this was kinda a boring blog ahahaha
Lets just say eevrything changes EMBRACE IT, let it help you grow into an amazing person.
My roomate. How to describe this guy. Hes sorta like my brother. Hes family. But damn. Ever watch someone start to fall off the tracks and literally all you can do is watch?! Because no matter what you say it's falling on deaf and blind eyes and ears. heartbreaking really.
I seem to only write these blog in and around high carb day haha.
Ive dropped around 3lbs so far and a percentage since a couple of weeks ago.
I'm going about this whole process completely different than i have before.
Heck I started off going about it the same way then realised.... damn that so is not the way for success. So after revamping and figuring things out, Im more than 100% confident in my dial in for the WBFF worlds stage.
Im at the point in my fitness where I get mad dehydrated if i even think about eating shit food. And if i do, damn it feels like Ive been in the sahara for 72 hours straight. Hahaha. Its actually awesome, means the msucles are pulling in the water when I intake carbs, hmm.
I've been 100% about the diet since 17 weeks out and have already notcied huge changes in my leaness. It's only going to get more tedious and strict as the next week comes to a close.
I pulled back a bit on my cardio and really have focused 100% on the diet. its all about the diet no matter how much I wanna convince myself it isnt haha. Im going to start my double a day cardio sesh's at the 12 wks out mark. I havent full decided if Im giong to do the Oxygen cover model search however Im definetely concidering it.. and am actually headed to see Joan @ Daydreams Fitness Wear to get an old suit i havent used yet fitted JUST IN CASE!
My main focus if WBFF. I've decided by this time next year Id like to be competeing for my pro card or amongt the pro division.
Im so amped I just want the final week before my show to come it's actually my favorite, the water loading, the tediousness, its wat drives me now. Fitness saved my life and I cant wait to conitue giving it the best of me.
Anyway bootcamps and chest today. Have an awesome day til next time.
man this was kinda a boring blog ahahaha
Saturday, May 21, 2011
goodbye world....
well i guess this will be my last post concidering the world is going to be raptured today and ya, we're all doomed... CRAP!!! so many things i wanted to do.. lol; come on people, really?! Lol however, whenever, the world ends, Id almost bank on it being 100% sudden, unexpected and we're all gonna be saying "awww shit this so isnt like the movie 2012".
I believe, and have come to be born again in Christ. I was lost for awhile there in my faith, but over the past few months man, Hes found me and brought me back. Amazing. Simple as that. And in my belief, I have no idea when He's coming back...
Trying everyday to breathe You in.
So todays a high carb day had sum extra oatmeal with sum banana. then passed back out and woke up to the sun shining brightly. wattta day!!
Lol OK so sometimes I freak out on my roomate for eating my food, haha, any of my friends have probably heard me rant about this on several occasion. its freaking annoying; haha but I'll give my roomate a huge tonne of slack cuz in all reality he's an awesome guy haha, he tries and Im blessed to have him in my life. Hahaha DUDE i might hate on ya alot but i always got your back my brother!! Just stop eating my damn food or watch yourself while your sleeping... ahahahah jkkkkkk
I'm off to train legs day in awhile, then get out and enjoy this amazing weather and then hit up some bootcamp traing with Andrea. Who BTW watch out everyone; shes gonna be taking the WBFF worlds stage for the very first time EVER.
Ive been getting msgs from ppl re: traing tips. DONT worry I got chu,, ill get back at ya; my clock runs on a completely different time hahaha.
Have an amazing weekend er'body, keep it real and dont forget to take time and appreciate whatever it is in your life thats good.
heres something good to read http://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/fruit-myths-and-contest-prep.htm
I believe, and have come to be born again in Christ. I was lost for awhile there in my faith, but over the past few months man, Hes found me and brought me back. Amazing. Simple as that. And in my belief, I have no idea when He's coming back...
Trying everyday to breathe You in.
So todays a high carb day had sum extra oatmeal with sum banana. then passed back out and woke up to the sun shining brightly. wattta day!!
Lol OK so sometimes I freak out on my roomate for eating my food, haha, any of my friends have probably heard me rant about this on several occasion. its freaking annoying; haha but I'll give my roomate a huge tonne of slack cuz in all reality he's an awesome guy haha, he tries and Im blessed to have him in my life. Hahaha DUDE i might hate on ya alot but i always got your back my brother!! Just stop eating my damn food or watch yourself while your sleeping... ahahahah jkkkkkk
I'm off to train legs day in awhile, then get out and enjoy this amazing weather and then hit up some bootcamp traing with Andrea. Who BTW watch out everyone; shes gonna be taking the WBFF worlds stage for the very first time EVER.
Ive been getting msgs from ppl re: traing tips. DONT worry I got chu,, ill get back at ya; my clock runs on a completely different time hahaha.
Have an amazing weekend er'body, keep it real and dont forget to take time and appreciate whatever it is in your life thats good.
heres something good to read http://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/fruit-myths-and-contest-prep.htm
Friday, May 20, 2011
Awesome!!
so since being out of school theres been absolutely no excuses to not be 100% with the diet.
carb cycling is amazing, i love it. i did it for my first show and now with even more education, knowledge, exerpence and understanding of myself and my body, this is gonna be a breeze. well ok
its not gonna be easy, im only writing this blog right now cause the ONLY thing running through my mind right know is eating bananas with peanut butter, having sum ice cream and being fat all night. hahaah
but no legit, food doesnt really taste the way it used to anymore, okay theres some food which is just plain BOMB diggity yo, like BLTS, BOMB, pineapple BOMB, BBQ chicken BOMB, brownies BOMB. but im aiming so high NONE of that even remotely seems to care.
It's funny though; now being on diet since the end of janurary, "on diet" i mean cutting out those awesome offseason fun stuff! putting on the size i needed to be satisfied and DAMN homie, i was lookign through my old pictures and holy crap, how much i have changed. mentally, physically, spiritually. its been an amazing growing, literally, exeperience and i cannot wait for more!!
im all over the place cuz im not really able to grasp a full thought for too long oh ya.
im really not down , never have been, for those people who think theyre better than everyone else.
hey im not flashy, i dont have a lot of money, i dont have the most expensive clothes, never have; ive worn hand me downs, only buy clothes 3x;s a yr, i really only get dolled up when im competing or going out on the townand i stay in on fri-sun, dont go out during the week; id rather wear sweat pants than skinny jeans, i rather throw around 45 plates with the boys than watch gossip girl... ya i geuss thats boring lol, same routine everyday... but i help people, i listen and im not just waiting for my turn to speak, i try to be as real as i can be but im not perfect, and i dont ask for much in return just respect. im not bout the money, im about the loyalty. idk i jsut seem to come across and encounter a lot of people who simply have no idea where they stand in the world. they dont really get to me partly because, hey listen, its not ur life, why u tripping?! meh; im not gonna be a hypocrit and say i havent done my shit and done a lot of things, but trust me karma is in full effect and ive been dealt my hands for my actions; but legit; its not like my karmas still biting me in the ass, its more or less ive reached the point where i gotta ask ya'll. why is there a heck of a lot of mean selfish people out there? not to mention unhappy?!
LIVE LIFE, love it, live it for yourself and dont hurt others as best you cant, dont judge or prepare to be judged, have an open mind and heart but dont be a fool; constantly, no matter what, let your expeences in life change you and shape you, grow, be better than yesterday; strive for more. im not saying smile like a goof to everyone you see and strike up convos to every old lady you cross; but damn homie, if given the chance to do good, DO IT! stop take a minute think.
thats about the only thing which gets to me more and more as i diet and chug along. hahaaha
saw this post on my friends pics!
"My passion, you call obsession... my commitment you think unwarrented, my drive you can't comprehend so to you it must be flawed, you tell me to live, I tell you to quit dying.. Do I make you uncomfortable? GOOD. Now stand up and find yourself your own PASSION."
Yo some people ask me why? Why so into it? Why so serious about it. From some friends to my parents its why? Well why not?????\
Fitness saved my life, if you know me you'll fully understand where i came from where I have been, and how utterly dark i had become a few years back. i was in a BAD place, and it was lonely too. dark and lonely NOT A GOOD COMBO! hahaha
but now its a 180, life is FUCKING AMAZING. ive come a long way and im proud to say im still here.
crap my roomate keeps eating all my healthy food. legit its the most annoying thing, espeically if youre not dieitng cuz you can pretty much eat whatever.
like legit homie.
you drank my diet coke, while eating my chcolates i was saving for my show.
uhh goddamn
carb cycling is amazing, i love it. i did it for my first show and now with even more education, knowledge, exerpence and understanding of myself and my body, this is gonna be a breeze. well ok
its not gonna be easy, im only writing this blog right now cause the ONLY thing running through my mind right know is eating bananas with peanut butter, having sum ice cream and being fat all night. hahaah
but no legit, food doesnt really taste the way it used to anymore, okay theres some food which is just plain BOMB diggity yo, like BLTS, BOMB, pineapple BOMB, BBQ chicken BOMB, brownies BOMB. but im aiming so high NONE of that even remotely seems to care.
It's funny though; now being on diet since the end of janurary, "on diet" i mean cutting out those awesome offseason fun stuff! putting on the size i needed to be satisfied and DAMN homie, i was lookign through my old pictures and holy crap, how much i have changed. mentally, physically, spiritually. its been an amazing growing, literally, exeperience and i cannot wait for more!!
im all over the place cuz im not really able to grasp a full thought for too long oh ya.
im really not down , never have been, for those people who think theyre better than everyone else.
hey im not flashy, i dont have a lot of money, i dont have the most expensive clothes, never have; ive worn hand me downs, only buy clothes 3x;s a yr, i really only get dolled up when im competing or going out on the townand i stay in on fri-sun, dont go out during the week; id rather wear sweat pants than skinny jeans, i rather throw around 45 plates with the boys than watch gossip girl... ya i geuss thats boring lol, same routine everyday... but i help people, i listen and im not just waiting for my turn to speak, i try to be as real as i can be but im not perfect, and i dont ask for much in return just respect. im not bout the money, im about the loyalty. idk i jsut seem to come across and encounter a lot of people who simply have no idea where they stand in the world. they dont really get to me partly because, hey listen, its not ur life, why u tripping?! meh; im not gonna be a hypocrit and say i havent done my shit and done a lot of things, but trust me karma is in full effect and ive been dealt my hands for my actions; but legit; its not like my karmas still biting me in the ass, its more or less ive reached the point where i gotta ask ya'll. why is there a heck of a lot of mean selfish people out there? not to mention unhappy?!
LIVE LIFE, love it, live it for yourself and dont hurt others as best you cant, dont judge or prepare to be judged, have an open mind and heart but dont be a fool; constantly, no matter what, let your expeences in life change you and shape you, grow, be better than yesterday; strive for more. im not saying smile like a goof to everyone you see and strike up convos to every old lady you cross; but damn homie, if given the chance to do good, DO IT! stop take a minute think.
thats about the only thing which gets to me more and more as i diet and chug along. hahaaha
saw this post on my friends pics!
"My passion, you call obsession... my commitment you think unwarrented, my drive you can't comprehend so to you it must be flawed, you tell me to live, I tell you to quit dying.. Do I make you uncomfortable? GOOD. Now stand up and find yourself your own PASSION."
Yo some people ask me why? Why so into it? Why so serious about it. From some friends to my parents its why? Well why not?????\
Fitness saved my life, if you know me you'll fully understand where i came from where I have been, and how utterly dark i had become a few years back. i was in a BAD place, and it was lonely too. dark and lonely NOT A GOOD COMBO! hahaha
but now its a 180, life is FUCKING AMAZING. ive come a long way and im proud to say im still here.
crap my roomate keeps eating all my healthy food. legit its the most annoying thing, espeically if youre not dieitng cuz you can pretty much eat whatever.
like legit homie.
you drank my diet coke, while eating my chcolates i was saving for my show.
uhh goddamn
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